A young woman mocked my age at the airport, then spent our entire flight throwing her long hair into my face and food. She thought a 73-year-old woman couldn’t fight back. Good thing I’d made one very unusual purchase at duty-free.

bin.

The blonde stopped one row ahead and spun around to show her followers the cabin.

Her hair spun with her, half a second late.

It caught him across the face. His glasses went one way. His bag went the other.

I caught the bag.

“Thank you.” He retrieved his glasses. “I believe I’ve just been assaulted by a shampoo commercial.”

“I believe you have.”

“Should I file a report?”

“It would be a long form. There’s a lot of surface area.”

He smiled. “Harold.”

“Martha.”

“Martha, I do hope